Decode her diggs

Investigate her home to decide if she’s right for you

1. IS SHE GOING TO BE CLINGY?
Look for pairs of anything

Two nightstands, a bedside lamp on each side of the bed, pairs of candles… “If you see pairs – and lots of them – run for the door if you don’t want a relationship,” says sexologist and author Yvonne Fulbright. “Consciously or not, she’s displaying the belief that creating balance in the bedroom invites love into your life.” Look to escape.

2. WILL SHE BE HIGH MAINTENANCE?
Look at her photos

Check out her party snaps. If she’s always front and centre, you’ve got a high-maintenance attention-seeker. “But if you see lots of photos of animals, she’s channeling a maternal instinct,” says New York psychologist Dr Gary Aumiller. Great if you have an Oedipal complex.

3. WILL SHE BE EASY TO TALK TO?
Look at her furniture

A cluttered room suggests an open book, she’ll spill her guts to you. “But a more private person will have backs of chairs facing doors, and confined traffic patterns,” says design psychologist Dr Constance Forrest. Otherwise, use wine to get her to talk.

4. IS SHE GOING TO BE CONTROLLING?
Look at her bookshelf

Are her books alphabetized by subject? By author? “A personalized Dewey Decimal system can mean neuroticism,” says Aumiller. “But general orderliness indicates someone who’s responsible.” Cluttered shelves are a sign she’s a free thinker. Or her cleaner’s away.

Sex on the beach

The beach offers maximum opportunity – how long does it take to remove a bikini? – but it does come with risks. During the hottest parts of the day, areas of your skin not usually exposed to the sun can burn in the time it takes to do the deed. And pay attention to the wind. If it’s blowing sand into your face, imagine how it will feel on your sensitive bits. Your moan of pleasure might also be silenced by a mouthful of sand.

Hook her interest

Passion is contagious. Expose your woman to new things, and she’ll experience new things about herself. Best part, she’ll pair you mentally with adventurous behaviour, and will want more of you.

Risky business

“Risky behaviour of all kinds boosts arousal” says Alan Booth, professor of Sociology and Human Development at Penn State University. Even better, “Women who participate in physical activity are more easily aroused, have a stronger libido and have an improved ability to reach climax,” says Cedric Bryant, professor and chief science officer for the American Council on Exercise. And if you can’t keep her on her toes, you’ll pay dearly. How? Boring sex, if any.

Train your tongue

You’ve brought her to a dribbling frenzy with your dexterous hands. Now it’s time to lick her lips. First practice on your intimate friend the plum, which will have split by now if you’ve been practicing your hand-massage technique. Take the plum and press your tongue against the split. Put the thick, middle part of your tongue on the base of the split and slowly sweep upwards. Try pressing and stroking the split with different pressures and speeds. When it comes to the real thing, her moans will be a sure indication of what sends her rocketing. The tongue is an amazing muscle, so use it to full capacity. After a few, long strokes that gently massage her whole vulva, add a tongue-tip flick at the upper end of the labial split.

The combination of stimulation on her inner lips and the erotic tickle of the tip of your tongue on her clitoris will send her into an extreme pleasure spin. To really put your tongue through its paces, practise on the plum a little more. Lick the inside of the split, using your tongue to try and access the stone. If you get to it, try to extract it. This exercise works your tongue muscles, increasing your power and stamina for cunnilingus. You don’t want your tongue to wimper and die at the crucial moment.

Touch, tap and blow

Touching her clitoris is often not enough. Some women also love a light genital tapping, which encourages blood flow to the skin’s surface and charges the nerve endings. Also try placing your thumb and forefinger around the clitoral hood, gently pinching the clitoris and rolling it between your fingers. Now pull the hood up, exposing the clitoris, and blow gently on it. Then, with the lightest touch, use a lubricated fingertip to stroke it in different directions to see what she likes best – try side to side, upwards, downwards or circles.

Give her the best sex

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