The K-spot?

Experiments conducted by the authors of The Science of Orgasm discovered an orgasm-like response from the stimulation of a woman’s knee. A vibrator applied to this body-part caused an increase in muscle-tension leading towards the top of her legs, which resulted in climax. Exploit the orgasmic potential of running your hands up and down her legs before and during sex, paying particular attention to the area between the very top of her thighs and the crook of her knee.

Women you should date

Sure, you’ve gone out with 20, 30 women. But we’re willing to wager that you’re actually dating the same woman over and over again. We often return to similar patterns, to familiar personalities and modes of interacting. Not only does dating the same type of woman become boring, it also doesn’t allow you to evolve. But with our roster of classic womanly personalities as a guide, we’ll help you figure out what it is that you’re attracted to, why you may be stuck in that pattern and what you could be missing out on – both romantically and sexually – by not mixing up your playlist.

1. THE URBAN SOPHISTICATE

Her strengths
This woman is funny, hot and spontaneous. When you walk into a room with her, everyone stares at you in envy. Neil Strauss, author of the bestselling dating memoir, The Game, puts it simply: “This is the kind of girl everyone wants and it makes you feel awesome when you’re the one who has her.”

Her weaknesses
“You need enormous confidence to date a woman like this,” says Strauss. “She gets off on attention, but you can’t get jealous.” If you’re independent you will dig her ambition, but make sure she wants you – and not just the ego boost you provide.

Her bedroom persona
She’s uninhibited and nicely groomed. Tell her you like her on top, preferably wearing something expensive that makes her breasts look hot.

2. THE ARTY HIPSTER

Her strengths
She knows where all the dive bars are, and all the art shows with free wine. She’s exciting and stylish, but not as untouchable as the Urban Sophisticate. “She actually likes nerds and intellectuals,” says Ian Coburn, author of God Is a Woman: Dating Disasters. And she actually cares about culture. “[This type of woman] can be great for a guy who wants to learn more about art and music,” says Dr Ian Kerner, a relationship therapist and author of She Comes First.

Her weaknesses
Do you keep going after her because you hope her cool will rub off on you? If your interests don’t match, don’t expect to just coast along on her taste. “Girls like this have opinions,” says Kerner. “And they want you to know the difference between Hunter S Thompson and Emma Thompson.” Better get reading.

Her bedroom persona
The good news: she’s dirty. The bad news: her bed’s not that clean. Tell her that if she changes the sheets before you come over, you’ll take her to see Manu Chao – in Spain.

3. THE VEGAN YOGA GAL

Her strengths
She’s got great skin and a long neck, and she gives you long back rubs with wacky oils. All that deep breathing means she rarely flies off the handle, and you value this perhaps even more than you value her amazing, high, tight rear – which is saying a lot. “This is a woman who really wants to make a deep connection with life, and a man who wants the same could be really into her,” says Strauss. Fisher says that independent, analytical or creative guys could find her alternative view fascinating.

Her weaknesses
“These women are almost exclusively interested in men who are into the same stuff they are,” Strauss notes. Love her, love her lifestyle.

Her bedroom persona
She’s just as Kama Sutra-esque as you were hoping – so no quickies. She likes it slow and soulful.

4. THE ALPHA FEMALE

Her strengths
She has no debt, a law degree and a sports car. She’s hard to keep up with. Ironically, it’s not the alpha dog who should try dating her. “A scientist, artist or teacher will do well with this woman,” says April Masini, author of Date Out of Your League. “If you’re not interested in power plays, she won’t fight you.”

Her weaknesses
She has a lot in common with alpha males, but these relationships are too intense. “They can’t make time for each other,” says Fisher. Coburn cautions that “pushover” types are often attracted to such women, and some alpha females are attracted right back. “Obviously, if this is your dynamic, it isn’t good.”

Her bedroom persona
She’s efficient and skilled, but she can be more than sufficiently animal if you help her let her guard down.

5. THE INTIMACY JUNKIE

Her strengths
She goes to yoga, too, but it’s the easy kind that’s more about “connection to the self” than sculpting a smoking bod. So what if she’s a little in your face. The sex is amazing. Strauss likes women like this: “She is the best kisser in the world. Very intense, very into connecting.” Fisher says independent men will love such a deeply verbal gal. Kerner thinks all men should date someone like this. “Most men need help learning to communicate. She will teach them how to.”

Her weaknesses
The intimacy junkie makes you feel great at first. She’s so into you and your feelings. Analytical men will find themselves easily ensnared in her macramé web. “He will be super into her at first, but there’s going to be a lot of talk about the ‘meaning’ of the relationship, which might cause it to implode,” Fisher says.

Her bedroom persona
She’ll do anything, including some things that scare you. The word “harness” comes to mind. Tell her you’ll do it if she gets waxed.

6. THE HAPPY HOMEMAKER

Her strengths
She’s no gold-digger – all she wants is a Volvo station wagon and a nice, cosy three-bedroomed house. She wants to have your kids, take care of them and take care of you. “Some guys draw a great deal of ego satisfaction from providing for a family, and there’s nothing wrong with that,” says Masini. A man who grew up in a very traditional household will love her. So, ironically, will the guy who grew up with domestic chaos because she’ll provide him with the stability he never had.

Her weaknesses
Remember that when she says she’s not going to work, she means it. Career-minded men might be happy with an arrangement that allows them to focus on their work while she manages their domestic life. But if financial stress builds, you may not be able to convince her to get a job.

Her bedroom persona
She’ll be accommodating and eager at first, less so with each offspring. Find a good babysitter so the two of you can steal away.

Break up stats

What is the best way to get over being dumped? Here's the results of online polls at Men's Health and Shape magazines...

Have sex as soon as possible with someone new
Him 35.1%
Her 15.1%

Alcohol
Him 8.5%
Her 10.1%

Exercise
Him 39.6%
Her 38.9%

Therapy
Him 1.9%
Her 9.6%

Work
Him 10.8%
Her 10.1%

Rehash it with your friends until you're sick of it
Him 4.1%
Her 16.1%

Talk her clothes off

The way to a woman’s bedroom is through her ears. That’s because for me and most women I know, chatting about relationships is as much fun as having them. But there are a few difficult conversations that men, try as they might, tend to screw up. That’s about to change. Here is your guide to the six trickiest relationship talks.

THE BIRTH-CONTROL TALK

She asks
“Did you bring a condom?”

You answer
“Why don’t you go on the Pill?”

Why that’s a mistake
You think you’re being honest and direct. She thinks you’re being selfish, and isn’t that just typical. Anger ensues. Sex doesn’t.

What to say instead
“Do you like how sex feels when I’m wearing a condom?” You do have a shot because most women prefer sex au naturel. Take her answer as a jumping off point to share your preferences. She’s not likely to say, “What a great idea. I’ll see my gynaecologist tomorrow.” So be willing to shelve this discussion for a few months – and to try various types of condoms – while she decides whether you’re Pill worthy.

THE ROOM-TO-BREATHE TALK
She says
“I need some space.”

You answer
“Have a nice life.”

Why that’s a mistake
When a woman asks for space, she’s not dumping you. She just wants a few days to herself. Or... she’s testing you to see how invested you are in the relationship. If you bolt, you fail.

What to say instead

“Take as much space as you need.” Chances are she’ll clear her head, miss you, and end up calling within a week.

THE STI TALK
She asks
“How many women have you slept with?”

You answer
“Thirty-six.”

Why that’s a mistake
Uh, hello, she wasn’t really asking how many women you’ve slept with. She was asking if you’ve ever been tested for sexually transmitted infections.But now that you’ve answered truthfully, she’ll be sure to hold it against you.

What to say instead

“I’m not really into keeping score but if you’re worried about STIs, I was tested last month” – or whatever the reality is – “and if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll see my doctor.” Then go. The more proactive you are, the more comfortable she’ll be and the better the sex will be.

Happy hours

Unexpected times she's yours for the taking

WHEN SHE COMES BACK FROM A GIRLS' HOLIDAY
Why she wants it
She hasn't spent all week tanning half-naked on a beach just to admire herself in the bathroom mirror. "Feeling body confident is the first step to wanting to take your clothes off and reveal what's underneath," says Spurr.

What to do

Hands off until the suitcase is unpacked. "Tell her to take a bath and pour her a glass of wine," says Spurr. "Compliment her, let her tease you by taking it slowly and she'll come to you."

24 HOURS AFTER A BRAZILIAN
Why she wants it

We're not talking post-sweaty interlude with Ronaldo the "handyman" here - she's endured the pain of bikini-line stripping because she wants her bald spot to be "suitably" admired by you.

What to do

Go softly. "Skin is more sensitive even a day after waxing," says beauty therapist Kim Broomfield. "This makes it even more responsive to touch." Remove her clothes slowly and kiss her belly, working down to the crease between her leg and upper body. "The skin here is ultra-thin and veins are extremely close to the surface," says Dr Pam Spurr, author of Sensational Sex. "Once you've reached her bikini line, lick her skin to stimulate even more nerve endings.

AFTER HER BEST FRIEND'S WEDDING
Why she wants it

"Weddings highlight any insecurities she has about your commitment to her," says relationship counsellor, Paula Hall. "Sex is the most intimate thing you can do to reassure her, and it releases bonding chemicals too."

What to do

"It's time for heartfelt words," says Hall. "Whisper to her that she's never looked more beautiful when the couple get hitched. The excitement of the event, combined with the secretive nature of the compliment, makes it all the more romantic." As soon as you get home, pull her to you and kiss her passionately. "Tell her to keep her outfit on and make love on the stairs. This kind of spontaneous passion is exactly the affirmation she's after." Just don't get your "spontaneity" all over that pricey frock.

Just teasing

She may be giving you mixed signals. In a poll, 64 percent of women admitted to “sexually teasing” a man. That is, they tried to make him think they would have sex but had no intention of closing the deal at that time. Motives varied, but a theme emerged: if she teases, she’s probably interested in a future encounter.

In the garden

Don’t ignore the possibilities of open-air sex in your garden. All the better if they involve a wheelbarrow or a low workbench – a great place for her to straddle you and pump up and down while you play with her bouncing breasts. Other opportunities include…

1. A hammock or tree house If you have a head for heights.

2. Kiddie pool On a warm day, fill up a kiddie pool and take a dip. Sit on your heels while she lies flat with her head on the opposite edge and raises her hips towards you.

3. Kid’s slide Take off her panties and have her climb the ladder ahead of you. At the top, have her bend over, feet still on a rung, breasts pressed against the slide. You hold tightly to the sides of the ladder. Flip up her skirt and have some slippery fun.